Posts tagged “resilience” (Page 2)

We all go through difficult times, and often when we’re experiencing these difficulties, we can’t possibly imagine how any good could come from them. However, whether it’s business or personal struggles, there are always great lessons that come from adversity. As you’re facing troubles, take comfort in these four great things we gain from facing adverse situations:

1. Adversity makes us resilient. The old saying that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is true. We gain strength from each trial, making us better able to face new trials as they come along. This strength will help us to continue to persevere to meet our goals. Each time we make it through something, we know we can make it through something else.
   

2. Adversity makes us think about things differently. When we face difficult challenges we have to question our traditional thinking patterns. These extraordinary challenges require extraordinary problem solving skills, helping us to broaden our minds and learn new ways to handle problems.

3. Adversity makes us grateful. If every pursuit is easy and every day is sunny, we lose appreciation for the good things and the things that do come easily. Troubles make us appreciate the good times even more and make us grateful for those who support us in good times and bad.

4. Adversity brings wisdom. As we go through challenges, we gain experience and wisdom that help us avoid challenges in the future or know better how to manage those that come. Often, our adversities are of our own making, but pushing through them gives us the wisdom to avoid similar mistakes later.

It can be difficult to remember the great lessons that adversity brings when we’re in the middle of a challenge. But, as we look back on the many challenges we’ve faced and how we’ve overcome them, we begin to see how those troubles have shaped who we are.

Each adversity brings new strength, and makes us think “outside the box” once more. For our struggle, we are rewarded with accomplishments and wisdom to help us meet even greater challenges, along with gratitude that allows us to appreciate all we do accomplish.

The ability to hold yourself accountable to your commitments each and every time is difficult to do, but will help you to increase your effectiveness and productivity by leaps and bounds.

Self-mastery requires essentially holding yourself to a “no excuses” level of accountability – even on commitments you’ve made only to yourself. This level of self-discipline will help you in several ways.

1. You’ll be more productive. If you never wimp out on what you’ve decided to do, you will accomplish more in your business and personal life.

2. You will make commitments more thoughtfully. Once you have internalized being so accountable, you’ll find that you don’t rush to make commitments. This helps you to prioritize your life more appropriately.

3. You will improve your reputation with peers, employees and personal contacts. A person who always keeps his or her commitments is viewed as particularly credible.
   

How Do I Increase My Self Mastery?

Of course, all of this is more easily said than done. Particularly when you’ve only promised yourself you’ll complete a task, it is easy to find many excuses to put the task off or forego it altogether. There are some simple ways, however, to help increase your chances of sticking to the commitments you make.

1. Believe in what you are doing. It’s much harder to flake on a commitment when you truly believe in the overall goal you are trying to reach. For example, before committing to volunteering your time to a charitable organization, be certain that you are really passionate about the cause. When you have that passion, it’s much easier to live out the commitment than when you are “ho-hum” about the cause. You don’t have to say “yes” to everything.

2. Plan and Schedule. Double booking yourself or failing to consider your other commitments can make it very difficult for you to do everything you’ve promised. Schedule your time for every commitment you make – even those you make to yourself. For example, if you’ve committed to working out more regularly, make an appointment on your calendar to go to the gym. This won’t automatically make you more excited about working out, but it will eliminate the excuse that you don’t have the time. Schedule time with family and down time for yourself, too.
   

3. Share your commitments with others. Use your family and friends to help you stay accountable. Share your goals with them and ask them to check in with you about how you’re doing. Keeping your commitments to yourself a secret only makes it easier for you to let these fall by the wayside. Having an accountability buddy can also be a great support system.

Personal accountability is a challenge for many people. Things like scheduling too many things, being tired or needing down time can all get in the way of keeping up with your commitments. But, when you plan appropriately and examine the commitments you’re making, it’s much easier to do what you say you

Your integrity is an important part of your personal brand. Most leaders have the best of intentions when making commitments but may fail in the follow through due to unforeseen circumstances and or poor planning. In order to protect your reputation, it’s very important to be a person of your word, ensuring that others can count on you to do what you say you will. Here are three tips to help you make the right commitments and keep them.

Keep a calendar. People who consistently keep a calendar are much better at juggling their commitments, which helps ensure they don’t over commit. If your calendar is part of your everyday life, you will always know what you can commit to, and what you can’t.

Prioritize where you will donate your time. As a leader, you are likely asked frequently to give of your time. In order to avoid being spread too thin, it is important to know which organizations have highest priority on your list. This will make it easier for you to weed out the things you simply don’t have time for when life gets busy. If you have identified volunteering at your child’s school as a top priority, for example, you will know that during busy times of the school year, you are unable to take on additional volunteer activities. When things slow down, perhaps during summer vacation, you can take on volunteer work with another group.

Learn to say “no”. Many of us hate saying no, particularly to a good cause. But, it is better to say no upfront when you know your schedule doesn’t really allow the time to do what you’re asked than to back out at the last moment or do a poor job because you were out of time.

Communicate proactively. Let people know when you’ve run into an obstacle. For example, if you promised a customer an answer to his question today, but you still don’t have the answer, it’s critical to call him today anyway. Giving him the update that you are still waiting for an answer and giving him a new commitment for getting back to him will assure him that you are someone he can count on to do what you say.

Being a person others can count on is an important character trait. Your reputation and your personal brand depend upon your ability to keep your word consistently.

Commitment is one of the most important aspects of success, regardless of the type of goal. Commitment, when it is true and deep, is a great fuel for moving forward. It is important to understand, however, even when you are deeply committed to a goal, you must have the systems in place to help you meet that goal.

Too often we want to rely on willpower to help us meet our goals. However, relying on willpower is often ill-fated, as it is a resource that runs out quickly. We only have so much mental and physical energy to support willpower, and soon we give into our old habits because we are drained of this energy.

Rather, to meet goals, it is important to have systems in place to help move you forward. These systems will operate when your willpower fails, helping you to stay on track.

A simple example is of the proverbial dieter, who has vowed to give up cookies. This dieter is much more likely to be successful if she ensures that she doesn’t have access to cookies in her home than if she buys cookies, ostensibly for her family, relying on her willpower to refrain from eating them. It is likely that there will come an evening, after a long hard day at work, when she is tired and hungry. The cookies on the shelf will seem to be calling her name, and it will be too much for her willpower to overcome.

Systems set you up to be successful. Systems can be routines that help you stay on track, or even support people who hold you accountable. Systems can also be substitutes, helping you to replace problems or obstacles with more acceptable means. Using the example above, support systems might include dieting with a buddy, while substitutions might include buying low calorie cookies to help avoid a feeling of deprivation, allowing the dieter to have a snack.

Change is difficult, and making real change takes a period of practice. Having the systems in place to help you develop the right habits and keep them, will help ensure your success in making the changes you need as a leader.

The expectation in today’s world is that we are always connected. We have 24/7 access to news and social media and connect with our friends in an instant. This instant access has its perks, but it also has its downfalls. Taking a little time to disconnect from electronics can provide several important benefits. Consider these things you might gain from unplugging for a while.

Less stress – The requirement to be “always on” and “immediately responsive” creates stress. Unplugging for a while can allow you to destress and relax.

More intimate connections – When we’re always plugged in, we may connect with more people in a day, but the connections are more superficial. Take a little time to have a face to face conversation with someone you care about with no interruptions.

Greater mental focus – Constant connection often equates to constant interruption. When you really need to focus on something, disconnecting while you work may help you to do a better job and get the job done more quickly.

Easy Ways to Make Sure You Disconnect Regularly

Disconnecting from technology will be most beneficial if you practice it regularly. Here are some simple rules you can use to help you avoid being overly connected and allow you some time to recharge.

1. No phones at dinner. When you sit down with your family for a meal, make it a rule that phones are not welcome at the table. This allows you to have conversation with each other face to face.
2. Turn off your phone at the same time each night. There’s no reason to stay on the phone until bedtime every night. Shut down well in advance of bedtime to allow yourself to wind down.
3. Wait to look at your phone and computer first thing in the morning. Give yourself an hour to get ready for the day before you begin the day’s connection. Have coffee (or your favourite beverage), take a shower and allow yourself to wake up in peace.

Technology is a beautiful thing. But, it’s not so beautiful when it controls your life. Take charge of your connection time and recognize when enough is enough.

Many of us do an excellent job of taking care of everyone else, yet neglecting our own needs. In fact, many people actually feel guilty about doing things for themselves, especially if it means they might have to say “no” to the need of another, even temporarily, to do so. However, what many people don’t realize is that those people who must take care of others, whether their family, or their business, can be more effective at being the caretaker if they care for themselves first. After all, as the saying goes, “You can’t pour from an empty cup”.

Here are three reasons why you need to make time for yourself and make your own needs a priority.

1. You can avoid burnout. None of us can go on indefinitely without taking a little time away. Eventually, your lack of attention to yourself will result in poor decisions, frustration or giving up on your goals. By taking a little bit of time for yourself regularly, you can stay recharged.

2. You can look at problems with a fresh eye. When you take a little time away, you can often find perspective on your biggest problems when you come back to them. Very often, the things that seem impossible to solve or catastrophic seem much less problematic once you’ve stepped away for a little while.

3. You can help others more genuinely. When you are constantly meeting only the needs of others, you can begin to resent those who depend on you. Once you’ve given yourself a chance to have a little personal down time, you’ll find you are able to take care of others happily again.

Giving yourself down time doesn’t always mean doing something radical. Sometimes taking a moment to enjoy a glass of wine before moving on to your next task can be the break you need. Rediscovering an old hobby you’ve neglected can help to refresh your mind. Having a date night with your significant other or reading a book just for fun are also ways you can recharge and take care of yourself. Do whatever works for you….but make it a point to make your own needs as much of a priority as the needs of others in your life.

As a business leader, it’s likely that you spend most of your time focused on your day to day actions. Of course, this is important, but it can be just as important to ensure you’re having the right thoughts throughout the day, as well. When was the last time you examined your daily thoughts?

Your inner voice has a powerful effect on your overall attitude and outlook. If you are constantly having negative thoughts, you could be setting yourself up for a number of unhappy experiences. Negative thoughts can contribute to the following bad habits:

• Procrastination – If you’re constantly telling yourself that your work doesn’t matter, or that the outcome will probably not be what you want, you’ll likely find many reasons to put off getting that work done.

• Stress – Constantly dwelling on the negative or assuming that the worst will happen creates stress, which can lead to many different emotional and physical health issues.

• Negative Effect on Others – If your inner voice is making you feel negative about yourself and your work, your attitude is likely visible to others, at least in subtle ways. Even if you don’t voice your negativity, you are likely putting out a “negative vibe” to others. This can demotivate employees and affect your personal relationships, too.

Check Yourself
Take the time to write down the negative thoughts that plague your mind. Then, write down the thoughts you should use to replace the negative ones. Keep the list where you can see it for a few days. Whenever you find yourself thinking negative thoughts, force yourself to replace them with the kinder words on the list. It will take some discipline on your part, but you will find, over time that you have reprogrammed your brain to be more positive in your thoughts and outlook. When you reach this point, you should find yourself happier and sporting a much more positive outlook on life.

Life is full of unexpected twists and turns. Each of us can look back and remember times when we got news for which we weren’t prepared. Happy unexpected news generally elicits a pleasant response, however, sometimes bad news elicits more of a reaction than a response.

Do you know the difference? The details that differentiate a response from a reaction may be subtle, but these can make a big difference in the decisions we make and in how we present ourselves to those around us in the face of bad news. Here are some differences between the two.

• A reaction happens immediately, a response may take a little time. In the face of bad news, it can be a good idea not to react too quickly. Your immediate reaction may be different than your response would be if given a little time to process the news.

• Reactions are emotional; responses are thought out. We have reactions; we formulate responses. When you respond you have come to some decisions about how you plan to handle the situation. When you react, you say the first thing that comes to mind, and you aren’t careful, you may act on that initial emotion.

• Reactions shouldn’t always be shared, but responses can be important to share. When you are a business person, it’s critical to be careful about sharing your initial reactions to things that happen with others. For example, let’s say you just found out that you have lost your largest client. Your reaction may be one of panic, but if you share that panic with your employees, they may fear for the business and for their jobs. Certainly, you will have to share the news with them, but by waiting until you’ve had a chance to determine how you will handle the situation, you can formulate a response that is measured and that appropriately communicates the situation.

It is human nature to react to news quickly. However, it is important to sometimes avoid the temptation to react out loud, especially in front of others. Taking the time to formulate a well thought out response will help you to keep things in perspective and to share that perspective with others when the time is right.

Many of us struggle with the feeling that we don’t get enough done in a day. In fact, many of us may feel that we don’t get enough done most days of the week. There are many different things you can do to increase your productivity during the workweek, but one of these things might be the simplest key to enhancing your output each and every day. It’s a simple thing called mindfulness.

Being mindful simply means doing what ever you’re doing with intention and with a focus on maximizing your time. When you are more mindful during the day, you are able to fit more work into the same amount of time by minimizing distractions, focusing on the task at hand and making yourself more aware of what you are doing and what you intend to accomplish. Here are some simple steps you can take to make yourself more mindful.

1. Have goals for the day. Each day you should have a list of “to dos”. Within this list, there should be a few things that are “must dos”, along with other items that must get done, but that are not as time sensitive. Each day, you must complete your “must dos” before going home. By knowing exactly what you have to get done, you’ll start your day in a more organized fashion, and you’ll have a goal of accomplishment each day.

2. Work in time segments. It is important to structure your day so that nothing takes up too much time. Have phone calls to make? Plan to make all your calls at once during a single period of allotted time. If one hour is a reasonable amount of time, allot yourself that amount and move on. You’re less likely to dally when you know that you have a limited amount of time to complete your task.

3. Minimize distractions. When you focus your work in time segments, it is easier to complete the tasks assigned to that time. However, it is still possible to get distracted by people who want to chat, emergencies that arise or by your mind’s own tendency to wander. When you are mindful throughout the day, you will find that you recognize distractions more easily, and find it easier to break away from them.

Mindfulness is a habit, just like any other. In the beginning, it can be difficult to show the discipline required to stay mindful throughout the day. However, with a little practice, and with the reward that comes from knowing how much you’re able to accomplish, mindfulness will soon become one of your favorite habits.