Self Leadership (Know Thyself)

“Self Leadership” By Cindy Stradling CSP, CPC

I have written about the subject of self leadership in previous blogs and I think it is an area where we all need reminders from time to time.  What I am referring to by self leadership is to know yourself (your areas of strengths and also the areas where you need additional support) so you can put structures in place to help when you get off track.

So much of what we do is habitual and unconscious and when we want to make positive changes we can be challenged if we are not aware of the choices we are making.  Have you ever had the experience where you have done or said something only to question yourself later “what was that all about?”  I know I have and it becomes a nuisance when it happens repeatedly.

In all of my training programs we spend time looking at our choices. My philosophy on this is that we only have two choices: we can choose reasons or results.  Participants will often push back and say they have good reasons for not meeting their objectives.  I challenge them to look closer and when they do they often agree they are excuses, not real reasons.

Over twenty years ago I attended a workshop led by Jack Canfield and I can remember a phrase he used “if it is to be, it is up to me.” Simple phrase, lasting impact.  To this day I remember that saying and it motivates me to keep taking the actions I know to do so I can achieve the results I want in my life.

Here are five tips to help develop more self leadership:

1)    Know who you are and take full responsibility for your life.  This includes how our think, speak as well as how you ask.  Be a role model for others.

2)    Clarity – be clear about what you want to accomplish and how you will spend your time. Focus on the activities that align with your values.  Develop the confidence to say “no” when the request doesn’t serve you.

3)    Live with integrity and authenticity.  Say what you’ll do and do what you say not only helps build self esteem and self leadership, it gains respect from others.

4)    Manage your emotions and exercise empathy.  I love the Buddhist’s saying “This too shall pass.”  When we have developed powerful self leadership skills we are able to manage our emotions appropriately and at the same time have empathy for what others may be going through.

5)    Develop the grace of gratitude. Be thankful for what you have accomplished and you will radiate self confidence and experience higher levels of self esteem.

I wish I could say I am perfect at being my powerful self, but I can’t.  I am a work in progress.  I have come a long way and feel very grateful for what I have accomplished. I get up excited each day for what the day will bring!  I know my success will be directly in alignment with the choices I make and I will continue to check in with myself to make sure I am getting the results I want.

What about you?  What do you want Reasons or Results?