Accepting What’s So by Cindy Stradling CSL, CPC

Everyone has different levels of physical and mental energy. Some people can easily run a marathon or compete in an Ironman triathlon after intensive physical training. Some people, no matter how hard they train, are just not physically able to manage those levels of competition.

The same is true for mental energy. Spending time and energy on unproductive thoughts or focused on “what ifs” or “what could be” are wasting their valuable mental energy. A good example of this type of mental energy drain is spent in stressing over things that are simply out of our control.

For some people, this is a constant mental recount of everything they have done that has not gone according to plan in their life. For others, it may be rehashing times they were uncaring, insensitive, or even hurtful to those around them.

Regardless of the root of the issue, spending time worrying about what you cannot control or change is simply a waste of time and mental energy. Using those past lessons to modify our interactions, behaviors, life choices, and decisions in the future is a practical and useful option, but spending too much time in the past is never helpful.

Learning to accept reality and stop focusing on a fictional or unrealistic assessment of the current situation and ourselves is a true gift. This also means accepting reality that may be difficult in the current moment and may continue to be difficult for some time in your life. However, by accepting reality and acknowledging the situation, you can turn your mental energy, creativity, and focus on making improvements based on the possibilities that exist.

Accept Your Reality

Take a close look at where you are and what is going on in your life. Look at it without judgment or comparison to something you want or the life someone else is living.

Accepting this reality, as well as who you are, allows you to have a starting point for your journey. Look at the positives and opportunities from a realistic and self-acceptance point of view.

Admit Your Responsibility and Take Credit for Positive Outcomes

Recognizing that you have made decisions, both good and bad, in your life is important. People who always blame others for everything wrong, and perhaps even everything right in their life, are not accepting of their ability to control their destination.

Even if you cannot control a situation, you can control how you react to the situation. For example, you may not be able to control losing your job, but choosing how to respond and getting into action can help you secure a new position.

Find Your Centre

Learning to understand what makes you feel successful and recognizing how you have done amazing things in your life is essential. When we accept our reality and feel good about where we are and what we are doing, we have a better quality of life.

People that know what makes them feel successful, accomplished, and fulfilled are living in their reality. Looking outside yourself to determine these things keeps you holding on to someone else’s truth and always falling short.